Something that I think Naomi Klein’s Dopplegangers articulated well is how corrosive hyper-individualism can be, and is. I saw someone comment on one of your notes lamenting that childcare is seen as work, since having a child is a two-way relationship that is “mutual” and provides tremendous joy. And while I agree that reducing a relationship with a child down to the work involved doesn’t quite get at the truth of it, this article of yours articulates well how much time spent on care detracts from our ability to particulate in an economy—which is the only way we can create supports for ourselves. And those supports are quite precarious ones, at that. And the people who can often provide supplemental social support to those who can afford it—read: immigrant and low-income workers—also serve a vital function for the society in the only way our society allows anyone to: through work.
Work/money is our keystone touch point into society in the framework of hyper individualism, and it’s also quite a convenient set up when people go looking for someone to blame. Because if the individual is at the center, then the individual must be at fault for their situations.
The way I see it, parenting has two sides. There’s the relationship side, which is made up of all the love and nurturing and supporting; and then there’s the work side—all the caregiving and household management. Obviously they come together, but we don’t have to conflate them. It’s perfectly rational to love our kids but find ourselves exhausted by the work; and we can look for solutions to work overload without devaluing our relationships with our kids. In fact, that’s what I think we have to do. And relief from that overwork will give us more capacity to invest in our relationships with our kids. We’ve simply got to work less.
People in minimum wage jobs cannot afford to pay minimum wage to domestic care workers - so either we need all “job” jobs to be more than minimum wage, or accept that domestic care will receive less than minimum wage (so essentially most industrialized countries require such workers, and making them illegal allows for more exploitation)
And that’s even assuming minimum wage is sufficient to live with dignity - it isn’t.
Wow, hyper-individualism. What a wonderful term, and so understandable for someone like me. I am not being dismissive or sarcastic. I am a fully functioning mentally ill retired special ed teacher who taught on the Navajo Nation for 6 years and then retired to Flagstaff, AZ and stayed for an additional 11 years. I mean, HELLO, in the West there are so many MALE “rugged individualists” that don’t give a rip about the planet or global society. All they care about is “their individual rights” as Americans. Does anyone pay attention to the Bundys? They had disputes with the BLM in Colorado over rights to public land. Then one (or more) ended up in the Pacific Northwest (can’t remember if it was Oregon or Washington state) in an armed standoff-off about appropriate use of public land. Don’t get me started on hyper-individualism.
I’m thrilled you’re making these points Jeremy! Can you take it one step further and not dilute the truth that domestic work is real work? (You only do it in juxtaposing it against “real” jobs, toward the end.) I’m all about changing the discourse to where we distinguish paid jobs from other work only by calling it out as paid. Because that itself highlights the existence of unpaid work. Same thing with “workplace” and “workforce.” Personally I’d love to substitute “jobplace” for workplace (home is a workplace, especially if you’re not a dude). I haven’t yet figured out an alternative for workforce that isn’t awkward….
Thank you for writing this.
Something that I think Naomi Klein’s Dopplegangers articulated well is how corrosive hyper-individualism can be, and is. I saw someone comment on one of your notes lamenting that childcare is seen as work, since having a child is a two-way relationship that is “mutual” and provides tremendous joy. And while I agree that reducing a relationship with a child down to the work involved doesn’t quite get at the truth of it, this article of yours articulates well how much time spent on care detracts from our ability to particulate in an economy—which is the only way we can create supports for ourselves. And those supports are quite precarious ones, at that. And the people who can often provide supplemental social support to those who can afford it—read: immigrant and low-income workers—also serve a vital function for the society in the only way our society allows anyone to: through work.
Work/money is our keystone touch point into society in the framework of hyper individualism, and it’s also quite a convenient set up when people go looking for someone to blame. Because if the individual is at the center, then the individual must be at fault for their situations.
This. Sooooo true!
The way I see it, parenting has two sides. There’s the relationship side, which is made up of all the love and nurturing and supporting; and then there’s the work side—all the caregiving and household management. Obviously they come together, but we don’t have to conflate them. It’s perfectly rational to love our kids but find ourselves exhausted by the work; and we can look for solutions to work overload without devaluing our relationships with our kids. In fact, that’s what I think we have to do. And relief from that overwork will give us more capacity to invest in our relationships with our kids. We’ve simply got to work less.
*participate in the economy
People in minimum wage jobs cannot afford to pay minimum wage to domestic care workers - so either we need all “job” jobs to be more than minimum wage, or accept that domestic care will receive less than minimum wage (so essentially most industrialized countries require such workers, and making them illegal allows for more exploitation)
And that’s even assuming minimum wage is sufficient to live with dignity - it isn’t.
Truth.
Wow, hyper-individualism. What a wonderful term, and so understandable for someone like me. I am not being dismissive or sarcastic. I am a fully functioning mentally ill retired special ed teacher who taught on the Navajo Nation for 6 years and then retired to Flagstaff, AZ and stayed for an additional 11 years. I mean, HELLO, in the West there are so many MALE “rugged individualists” that don’t give a rip about the planet or global society. All they care about is “their individual rights” as Americans. Does anyone pay attention to the Bundys? They had disputes with the BLM in Colorado over rights to public land. Then one (or more) ended up in the Pacific Northwest (can’t remember if it was Oregon or Washington state) in an armed standoff-off about appropriate use of public land. Don’t get me started on hyper-individualism.
I’m thrilled you’re making these points Jeremy! Can you take it one step further and not dilute the truth that domestic work is real work? (You only do it in juxtaposing it against “real” jobs, toward the end.) I’m all about changing the discourse to where we distinguish paid jobs from other work only by calling it out as paid. Because that itself highlights the existence of unpaid work. Same thing with “workplace” and “workforce.” Personally I’d love to substitute “jobplace” for workplace (home is a workplace, especially if you’re not a dude). I haven’t yet figured out an alternative for workforce that isn’t awkward….