Is this the cure to male loneliness?
I need your help...
Sorry for the catchy, slightly misleading title ☺️
I’m a big fan of using the end of the year to reflect backwards and look forward. This year I’m thinking a lot about where this newsletter fits into my life. And I’d love your help with that.
When I launched this newsletter almost two years ago, my goals were to figure out what men should be doing in our rapidly changing society and offer a different perspective from the loudest voices in the conversation, like Andrew Tate and Jordan Peterson.
I set out to publish one post a week on topics that seemed interesting to me. I didn’t care all that much if people commented or emailed me with their thoughts—though I always appreciated it. I was doing what many of us do online these days, chasing likes and subscribers. I wanted (and still want) this to be a big part of my workday, meaning it needs to bring in a certain amount of income to help pay the bills.
But something has shifted. And this is also happening in my work as a therapist. I’m starting to enjoy collaborating with other people more than working alone. Or at least being in conversation with others, rather than casting my hot takes from on high to the people below. More and more, I want to be in relationship with other people and not pretending I’m a self-made lone wolf who’s got it all figured out while pulling myself up from my bootstraps. I don’t want to be above anyone, as good as that can feel sometimes. I want to be in sometimes hard, sometimes gorgeous, messy community.
Basically, I’m tired of being lonely. And I keep hearing from other men that they’re dying for connection too. There’s something about having been socialized as a man in this society that repels many of us from the emotional closeness we so badly ache for. Other than maybe with a romantic partner (which causes its own issues). I’m on a journey to figure out why that is and how we undo it. And I’m grateful you’re here on this journey with me.
So, what do you think? What should I write about in 2025? What questions do you have? What topics should I dig into? “Positive” masculinity? Avoidant attachment style? Why young men are turning rightward politically? Healthy communication skills? Other topics related to therapy?
I really want to know. I might not be able to respond in-depth to every email, but I’ll try.
About that income thing... So far, I’ve made a little money from this newsletter, around $200 a month. It helps me pay for a few “date night” dinners with my partner, which we try to do every week.
But, like I said, I want this to be a bigger part of my workday. I want more time to read about where the outdated, unscientific, unhelpful ideas about so-called “traditional masculinity” come from and write counterarguments like this week’s post about “tradhusbands.” I also want more time to market Make Men Emotional Again on social media so more men can join our cause.
I’m about to take a big risk in the new year, starting my own therapy private practice. With that will come more independence and flexibility over when and how I help clients. But it will also come with less stability. I want this newsletter to continue to grow into something that can support me and this work we’re doing together—this change we’re making— in a solid way for a long time.
If you can afford five bucks a month or $50 a year to keep Make Men Emotional Again going, please hit this button and become a paid subscriber.
In case you missed it, here are my five favorite posts from 2024…